For Today


I felt you long ago
Your arms are mine
I met you long ago
Now we're dancing

Your smile
Like happiness
Your eyes
Like it is everything for you
that matters

The dance is over
You are trying to be good
The life is harder
You are trying to be good

2015/2016
One day I returned home and there was this smell of her parfume on my hands. I dared to dream about her just for that day.

Nature Conquers


Alone in the mountains
Nature conquers everything
Our minds, our hearts
Our future and the past

Suddenly you are sitting
Looking at the endless lake
Cottages full of solitude behind you
Cottages full of nature

Your feet are pleasantly frozen
The no emotion sun above you
You can’t see any path behind or ahead
You found yourself in a different way

You have nothing now
You are nothing now
So just take a step
And let the nature conquers you

August 2017
I was sitting inside while outside was rainnig. I was in Norway on my holiday. The day before I hiked the surrounded mountains. For the whole day I met just one person. I was tottaly overcomed by nature.

Je zvláštní takto žít


Je zvláštní takto žít
Ráno vstaneš a jdeš
A možná, že taky ne
Nevím

Věčně přemýšlíš, kdo jsi
Taky kdo nejsi
Nebo si lehneš
A ležíš

Každopádně je to zvláštní
Nic nevíš, a přitom se snažíš
Nějak být a snít
Věřit

Říjen 2017
Jednoho dne jsem si lehnul a přemýšlel jsem o tom, jak je život absurdní. Můžete jít po ulici a nějaký blázen vás zastřelí a vy skončíte. Není zvláštní takto žít?

Why Are You Still So Far Away?


I guess I could have told you this
About those dreams in joyful days
Not so happy as you might think
Also about the ones in dark
Not so hopeless as you might feel
All of this
When you have asked me
Why are you still so far away?

I guess I could have hugged you strong
With all my great beliefs in you
That closeness would have done the deed
I’m sorry just a bit for me
Sometimes one should at least do something nice
All of this
When you have thought
Why are you still so far away?

I trust you dear in seeing me
So what would be the point in giving up on you
I like it here
In your struggle and in your happiness
Your moody face is suddenly changed and even you don’t know why
I’m all in your playful smile
Full of kindness, full of kindness
All of this and slightly more when we are living
Why are you still so far away?

March 2018
The neverending struggle between introverts and extroverts. The feeling of loving someone so much but actually have nothing to say to them.

First Glimpse of Autumn


After numerous weeks of devastating heat
First glimpse of Autumn finally arrives
It starts with a stormy rain so dense, so you cannot see through it
And then on the second day the sun almost lazily breaks from its prison
Suddenly, the cold breeze is no more freezing but comforting
There is this key change inside your body, inside your soul
Almost, as some forgotten god is calling you for patience
Almost, as this is the only life you've ever had

September 2018
The moment when the autumn arrives and after heavy rain there is this fresh air.

Life in Reverse


I've been dead so many times that I've lost count
No, I don’t mean inside but literally dead
Imagine losing all of your dreams every now and then
In such moments life simply cease out
Thank God for always bringing me back
I guess I call it Phoenix stage

Come to think of it I have a handful of funeral songs
And not until today I dear to dream about a wedding one
You would think I'm not gonna mention the name
But hey, let’s keep this honest
It’s Into My Arms by my dear friend Nick
Because what could be possibly better than kind words of such a man?

I also have you on my mind
Simply cause you are everywhere where my joy is
Am I feeling happiness? I guess I am
Am I fearless now? For sure not
But maybe it’s finally a life worth giving
And when the end will come, I should only see some kind of light

December 2018
I was thinking about how miserable I was in the past and how I'm actually getting better and better. It almost seems as if I was living life in reverse.

Grasping Healing


Again my soul is dying hard
Sorry I think myself apart
The surface silent mourning now
The inside stormy question how

I don’t trust in my guts anymore
The saints have never opened the door
I'm screaming Jesus the only one
Forever present under the burning sun

Equations could convince for a while
Brother show me your fakeish smile
I must decide yet everything’s a lie
O Lord have mercy on me and let me try

Cause deaf is striking chords on my guitar
Cause gray is reading poems on my own
Cause blind is your beauty to my eyes

August 2019
Depression.

Longing


I miss you my darling one
You were never here but that’s just what I do
I miss you my dearest one
You are gone for forever but I…

My guts are twisting inside out
By your face I'm tortured in my dreams
I'm kicking and screaming for your love
Let’s be honest I'm just dying here alive

I wish I could touch you lightly like a breeze
I long to press your body till we collapse
I dare say: “Kiss me hard”
I dare say: “Let’s make thousands of children and spend the life together”

But remember you are there
You are forever gone
And I'm here all alone

October 2019
Sometimes being single is easy sometimes not. Sometimes you have this energy inside of you and you have no one to give it to.

Happens to the Heart


I always hide the truth in me
Not that I would be lying to you
It's just all things are hard to see
It’s just all things are hard to bear
The earth is spinning still the same
My world is broken deep apart
No-one around to curse or blame
What happens to the heart

This living does not worth the fight
I’m slowly dying in your eyes
There always be another night
To touch the stars, to scream my lungs
I dreamt about loving you dear
But it was just bodies in the dark
Don’t know the feeling fighting fear
What happens to the heart

So now I’m roaming streets of Brno
Tonight I drink black beer alone
I’m gonna be a builder of Lego
To think about nothing at all
Everybody has gone crazy for real
They cannot give you genuine smile
You always hiding, always fake
What happens to the heart

I’m hypnotized by the window line
To take one step and jump straight down
Oh, the torture bed for my twisted spine
You’re vomiting through the toilet hole
You’re beautiful girl with tired face
I cannot even reach your soul
God, I cannot even hold your tears
What happens to the heart

And just like that the heart is sank
I guess we used to dance in pain
We always wanted to win all sides
So naturally we lost it all
And now the heart is buried down
Under it all and it’s taking too long
I wonder how long before the damage is done
I wonder what happens to the heart

January 2020
The tittle and the structure of the poem is inspired by Leonard Cohen's song Happens to the Heart. The tittle got me into thinking about how much can take your heart if you are unwell for a long time. Where is the point of not being able to come back, of not being able to restore oneself and to forget.

Raped Love


You see, they are so sweet
They’re like a candy floss
Like a little kitten, they’re too cute
No one can dispute
Holding hands, whispering huge words
Forever and ever, yeah, forever and ever
They are fated, they are so into each other
You see, that must be it, the story from fairytales

Slow down and take a breath dear
Candy floss just decay your teeth
Kittens are stupid, troublesome and naive
In couple of years, maybe even weeks, you will see
It’s obvious they never liked each other
They are just too in love
In this very moment nothing could be above
But the time is always coming for the big love

But what about them?
You surely see they are something different
They are so long together that you cannot say who is who
They are always smiling to each other
They are living together
Going for holidays by their car
One day they were singing crazily to a tune
I expect they will marry soon

Don’t be childish
They are trapped in a cage
So, naturally they have to sing crazily
Smile is horrible twist of the mouth
They just got used to each other
That’s not living together, that’s rather dying together
They got stuck in a ridiculous pose
That’s why you cannot tell one from the other

And what about these two?
They used to be best friends
Now, they are something more
When he fell, she was terrified
When she cried, he was petrified
I’m sure they would give life for each other
Proof of love on every corner
Their life is going to be peaceful love

You quite right, they were truly best friends
And I’m quite sure they still are
“Something more” is such a cheap phrase
Cause is it truly more?
More often it is less, I would guess
Friends help each other and so they helped themselves
Cause to be left alone was simply unbearable
To face the unknown in such an age was infinite

Oh, but I know a guy and a girl, and they are infinite…

Oh, yeah, I know them too and they are true
There’s nothing much left to say
And that’s how you know that’s it

What is it?

I don’t know
It used to be called love but nowadays love is raped
Love is not what it used to be in the old books
Love is hanging on a billboard
Love is a cheap package for our joy
Love is something untouchable and sacred
Love is something mysterious
You either feel it or you don’t
You cannot work on it, it’s a miracle!
We live under the eye of a new god
God of love, the only one

Everyone screaming I’m in love!
There are so many loves as there are man
It doesn’t matter if you are going to hate each other
Or if you are going to get divorced
Or if you are going to scream that your girlfriend was a fucking bitch
Or if you are going to betray him in the worst possible way
No, nowadays this is just a byproduct

What matters is that you are persuaded you have experienced the true love
Because no-one can possibly lead life without experiencing the true love
So we just settle with our little lies and called them the true love
So the god of love, the only one, is satisfied

This may seem to you as cynicism
But if you think of it, it’s pretty romantic

February 2020
This poem is sort of a conversation between a naive and cynic person. But if you think of it the cynic person is rather romantic because he/she is persuaded that almost no love is real and that there is something "more" that not so many people can achieve.

What's For?


And what is the life good for?
If you’re not able to say what’s right
If you’re not able to say what’s wrong

The sky is blue and the grass is green
The dead is near and the Sun is heat
We love our brothers and so our sisters
We want to bath our feet in a spring
And sing, sing, sing!

I’ve been there too, I've also tried to doubt
To doubt simple facts in life
But it’s just for fools
You think, you are a martyr
But you are nothing but a joke

But tell me honestly
Would you care for something that’s permanent for forever?
And have you ever been doubtless about something that matters?
It seems that everything that matters to you is relative
Doesn’t it?

Once there was a painter
His canvas was white
He started just with one color
Sparkling with joy
But as he got older
He tried to get it better
He tried to come up with a new color every now and then
Oh, how he wished for a painting that would be perfect
Perfect for everyone
Yes, everyone could come up with a new color
Potentially he ended up with gray
Color of nothingness
Color of emptiness
Now, he is desperate
For every color he adds the painting is even more gray
Now he wishes for a fresh start
He would keep his canvas just for himself
He would paint just with his favorite
But gray is never gonna be white again

And what is the life good for?
If you are able to say what’s right
If you are able to say what’s wrong

March 2020
The more you get older the harder is to say what actually matters and what doesn't. Although there are things/ideas/feelings that are hard to doubt unless you don't want to doubt everything (what's the point of asking yourself if the sky is really blue?), almost everything that matters to us can be doubt. The older you get the more opinions you are going to hear and accept as possible answers. But what happens if you have too many answers for everything. Suddenly you don't know what is right or wrong. You realize that there is no such thing as right or wrong and you are desperate. You start to ask what is this life even for? Really, what is the meaning to live for? Because if there is none than why am I even trying?
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